Tri As You Might (A Guest Post)

Go Holly go!

This year we had a new member of our tri group, the Palm Harbor Tri Warriors and she just rocks. Holly did her first tri a couple weeks ago and for someone who hasn't "tri"ed before, it was a heck of a race! Thanks Holly for guest posting and giving people everywhere hope for their first tri! (And everyone reading, give Holly some love mkay????)

That girl behind me looks fast. I should move over and try to draft off her. Wait, can I even keep up with her? I wonder if everyone will stand up and wade over the sandbar or will they swim over it? Maybe I should dolphin dive. Oh no, how many racks back is my bike again? One, two, three, four. Yes, it was four on the right. Yikes, what just touched my foot? Hum, feet. That reminds me - did I remember to put my socks inside my shoes? That girl next to me is making a funny face; I think she’s peeing in the water. Do I have to pee? Oh man, now I do. What did we decide? Will Marcus be waiting for me at the swim out, or will he be over by the transition area? Okay, it’s about to start. Remember, this is your hobby. You do this for fun…

That was the flood of thoughts just moments before the start of my first triathlon. It was a frenzy of excitement, nerves, self-reassurance, and self-doubt. And it was all packed into about a ten second window! Who would have guessed it’s possible to contemplate so much, so quickly? But there I was, standing in waist-deep water about to set off on my first three-sport adventure. I was committed to seeing it through.

Several weeks prior, I decided to approach the Dunedin Tri with three simple goals: (1) Finish. I was pretty sure I could do that. (2) Finish without any panic attacks, accidents, or injuries. Again, pretty sure that would be the case but other athletes and Fate can change those plans. (3) Finish feeling good. That was the iffy goal. Sure, I’d done mock tris and bricks with my training partners, but this was my first sprint tri. And although I think the world of my training partners and my family, they were so confident that I would do great. What if I let them down? What if I let myself down?

Before I had much time to dwell on it, the air horn sounded the swim portion of my first tri was underway. As our pack of 30-34 year old ladies headed around the first buoy for the main stretch, I realized I was swimming so hard that I needed to breathe every other stroke. I was amazed at how people were just whizzing by me. I did a quick body check and realized I was just working way too hard, so I slowed it down a touch and kept swimming for what felt like a combination of forever and a millisecond at the same time. After about eight or nine minutes, I was coming out of the water, dodging walkers on the way to transition. I remember thinking, “OK, there are people walking. Time to make up some ground here.”

I hustled into T1, grabbed my gear, and headed out with my bike. I had decided to skip trying the shoes-already-clipped-in approach for my first race, so I clomped over to the mount line and away I rode! Thinking about my #3 goal (finish feeling good), I had promised myself to not go faster than 19 mph on the bike to assure I had something in my tank for the run.

I have to admit, it was hard to stay at that speed as others flew by, but it was comfortable and I was still passing plenty of folks. After two bridge-filled bike loops (which included a tattooed guy yelling at me and observing a pretty nasty wipe out on a sharp turn), I was back at transition. I took a little more time through T2, letting my heart rate recover a bit before the run. But no rest for the weary!

Pretty soon I was back out of transition and running. Again, I reminded myself of goal #3: finish feeling good. I made a quick commitment not to look at my Garmin too much on the run; else I risked jeopardizing that goal. I knew myself on the run. I would try to keep a certain pace versus listening to my body.

The run was beautiful, a mostly hard-packed trail with a few sandy spots. I remember thinking, “Finally, something I am comfortable with. Good thing they save this for last.” I finally settled into a good stride after about a mile and half, which was the point when my legs finally decided to accept they weren’t cycling anymore.

About a mile later, I remember thinking, “Why in the world would I pick this as my hobby? I must be some kind of masochist. This is ridiculous.” I was starting to get tired and it was getting hot. Some of the men from the wave behind me were starting to pass. But then, I could faintly hear the announcer’s voice congratulate the triathletes that were finishing. I was close!

I did a quick check for goal #3. Yep, I was tired but I was feeling good. No weird pains, no nausea. About that same moment, a training partner passed me on his sprint to the finish. Then I realized that I could see it, too. It was right there! I realized that I was going to finish at this point, so goals #1 and #2 were achieved! And I had just checked in on goal #3. So off I went with a big push to the finish. As I neared the blue mat, I was fueled by seeing my friends and family cheering me on. I teared up the second I crossed the line and my husband hugged me. I did it! It was one of the best feelings of my life. I crossed the line 1:19 minutes after my adventure started, and although tried, I achieved goal #3 too – I felt fantastic! About an hour later following lots of hugs, high-fives, water, snacks, and cheers for other athletes, we left the race. You’d think that’s where the story ends. Well…

About thirty minutes later, I started getting messages and texts asking where I was, why I had not stayed to pick up my award. Award?! Are you kidding me? That thought had never even crossed my mind. I was just happy to have finished. But sure enough, I had come in fourth place in my age group. I was so proud of myself, but what made me even happier was the joy my success seemed to bring to my friends and family. I guess for my next triathlon adventure, I’ll need to set some new goals!

Holly seriously you rock! Thanks for sharing!

* * *

What are your tri goals? Ever think about tri-ing, or do you already have the tri bug?

Swimming With Music: Flying too Close to the Sun on Wings of Pastrami?

I had 1800 meters to swim on Sunday after renovating my bathroom all day and since that's a really long stretch of time to be in stuck in my own head and since there's not much to do except for well, swim, I wanted to try something different.

Swim with music.

That's even possible, you ask?

Why, yes. Yes it is.

I have been salivating over a waterproof I-Pod holder and waterproof earbuds for a year now, dreaming of the possibilites of having music to swim to on the long swims, perhaps even stopping to do some solo synchronized swimming in the lap pool if the mood invited me, but the ones in the stores were too expensive to rationalize.

I thought about waiting till September for my birthday and begging but I could wait no longer.
I found them new on Amazon for exactly half the price and I had some left on an Amazon gift card. Score!

And so this weekend my new best earbuds made the maiden voyage across the pool many many times but not before they passed the tissue test first which was sticking some TP inside the waterproof case and submerging it to make sure my beloved I-Pod would remain snug and dry within the safety of their new thin plastic walls.The TP survived! Hurrah!

So I was off to the pool to try them out. I slipped into the freezing pool that's supposed to be heated, put on my marathon training mix, I put on my armband, put in my earbuds, goggles, swimcap (it felt like a lot of gear like I was headed out for extended deep sea diving) and ...

At first, I felt like a cat in a sweater.

It was really awkward and I felt like I couldn't swim with one of my arms correctly. Swimming with this thing on my left arm made me feel lopsided for a while. The wire kept getting stuck and when it wasn't, I was very aware of it swimming with me and then the music was just too fast to start out and it was distracting and throwing my breathing all out of whack.

No one was in the pool area but if they were, they'd have seen someone tangled in wires swimming off to the wrong side, hyperventhilating, with foggy goggles because my goggles also decided to act up on this day too. Normally they behave.

So I was zigging and zagging because I wasn't taking a full stroke with my left arm because of the armband and I kept having to stop and fix all these things and it sounds more annoying than it was really because I actually expected this for myself. Things that take a normal person 30 seconds to figure out usually take me 30 minutes when it comes to technology. At least.
I began to think that perhaps swimming with music was like George Costanza trying to combine sex and a pastrami sandwich: perhaps they're not supposed to be together. Like George, perhaps I was flying too close to the sun on wings of pastrami.

But finally, I made one last stop and final adjustment, I switched off the fast-music playlist and put it on plain old "shuffle" and loosened the armband a little so it was not an I-Pod tournequet and thought it's got to get better than this now.

And then...something happened.

At about 600 meters in I started getting used to this!

Perhaps George was doing it wrong and it IS possible!

All my adjustments held and this was actually pretty cool!

My goggles were behaving, the wire was properly situated, and a slow song came on, specifically "I Wanna Be With You" by Mandy Moore (dontjudgeme) and I slowed down and swam.

The next couple songs were fantastic and I was really starting to dig this!

And then it occurred to me that "shuffle" really isn't my favorite option and that I was in desperate need now of a "swim play list" complete with slow songs to start out and then increasingly faster songs. Something without festival music.
Because until that moment I had forgotten about all the Filipino festival music I had downloaded for my son's Spring Festival, where they highlighted the Phillipines.

Not that there is anything wrong with music from the Phillipines, it really is quite lovely! Just a little weird to exercise to for long periods of time and there is no way to fast forward without stopping because I put my I-Pod in the locked position.

So I was stuck.

It was very international sounding, there was a lot of cheering and whistle-blowing (oddly)  as if I were literally in a parade, but as I swam on I began to get used it and it was actually pretty cool and festivally, like I was swimming through Epcot or something. It sounded like something that you would hear while on one of the long lines waiting something for a really long time but it was cheerful and very parade-like and international -- it actually wasn't so bad.

Until of course it became the song that would never end. It would take a break and I would think it was over but then it would continue on, as if it knew I was waiting for the next song and it would tease me and pretend it was ending and then say, "Just kidding!"

I listened to this one song from laps 18-25 and trust me, I'm not a fast swimmer.

It was finally over and some Coldplay came on along with some other yummies and they saved me. Before I knew it, 36 laps were completed.

Swimming with music is like running with music to me: good for the long training sessions. Like this one.

Sure it takes some getting used to, but in the end, it was pretty cool!

I just need to make myself a better playlist for next time.

I will actually review the gear itself in a separate post (I bought it, it wasn't given to me to try out or anything), and I actually found an amazing deal on some good stuff, so I'm excited to pass that along.

I can't wait to do it again now that I got all the kinks worked out!

Have you ever swam with music? Would you?

(Do you swim? You should. It's really fun.)

Be like George Costanza. Do the OPPOSITE

It's no secret that I live half my life according the Seinfeld series.

My life in fact is made of up a series of Tommy Boy and Seinfeld references and I seem to surround myself with people who do the same.

This week I had a good workout and decent nutrition week and I realize now it's because I emulated my hero, George Costanza who said:

"I ALWAYS have tuna on toast. Nothing's ever worked out for me with tuna on toast. I want the complete opposite of tuna on toast!

Do you remember that episode? (Go watch a minute, it hilarious).

Of course it's not about the tuna, it's about going against my instincts to do the following: eat french fries, be lazy, cut my workout short and eat badly. (Of course he goes on to "get the girl" because he did the opposite of what he would have normally done... so see? It must work, right?)

What happens is the usual tale about mind versus body. My body tells me one thing (it's lazy, it's craving something, etc.) My brain begins to consider these things as fact and eventually becomes convinced somehow that my body is right even when it isn't and then it eventually agrees to whatever sabotaging setup my body has created for itself.

Well no more!

Because I'm doing the opposite!

When I want fast food, I eat good food!

When I wanna be lazy, I will do whatever the opposite of lazy is at the time! (I can't think of the opposite word for lazy. But in this scenario it probably has something to do with folding and putting away laundry and/or making time for exercise.)

When I want to flight I'm gonna fight!

When my instinct is fear, I'm gonna be fearless!

See, the more George disobeyed his instincts, which usually got him into trouble, the more successful he became! And it worked for me last week so this is what I'm doing.

I'M DOING THE OPPOSITE!

I suppose if you're on the right track already, doing the opposite will not work. So don't do that.

If not, turn off your brain and DO THE OPPOSITE!

And see what happens.

Giving Yourself Credit

Do you give yourself enough credit?

I know I don't.

I probably don't actually know the answer about you, but I am pretty confident anyway that the answer is "no" for you too. And that's a shame. I realized that this morning. There is a serious case of credit debt going on around here and it has nothing to do with anyone's financial situation.

Here's my theory on credit. I didn't know I have one but now apparently I do.

I think perhaps so many of us know someone who maybe, perhaps, might give themselves a little too much credit. And as a result, and out of fear of giving ourselves too much credit, we overcompensate their overcompensation, with undercompensation. (Does that make sense?) Like somehow it evens out the world or karma or something.

And I realize there are a lot of "compensations" in that sentence but the only compensation that's going on is actually going to other people! None of those compensations are even for us! We're so afraid of going over the line that we go way way under. We think that giving ourselves too much credit isn't fair to other people (they may in fact be taking other people's credit in the meantime in order to supply themselves with more as the case may be.)

But taking none for yourself isn't fair either.

Consider this.

It's not like you can even save credit for someone else because this type of credit isn't like the credit situation in our country, credit can be given where credit is due and there is no ceiling on how many people can give themselves credit where credit is due, or rather, what I like to call, mad props, yo.

There might be a personal ceiling; an amount of credit that is too much for one person. But just because someone takes too much of it for themselves doesn't mean there's not enough left for other people. In fact, it's probably why we get so mad when someone takes our credit. Because we already don't give ourselves enough credit and now someone's gotta take the little that we're not even claiming? (That part is infuriating!)

But let's just say for a second that we live in a perfect world where no one takes other people's credit. Let's just leave that out of the equation entirely. Because we can just ignore those people anyway in real life. (I usually run far far away from them myself. I can't handle the stress as I get older.)

Let's just get back to our own credit.

How do you feel when someone else does something amazing and then when they're done and you say, "WOW!!!!! GREAT JOB!!" they respond with, "Yeah, I guess it was ok."

Don't you want to shake them and say, "LOOKIE!! LOOKIE AT WHAT YOU DID, THAT WAS AWESOME! You should be PROUD!"

And sometimes we do actually shake them. And they still shrug and say, "I don't know, it was nothing."

(Are you either one of those people in the scenario? I have personally been both.)

So right there. That's the perfect example of credit left unspoken for, left out in the cold, flapping in the breeze. Poor poor, homeless credit. It can't even go to someone else! And now you've gone and left it out in the cold with no home whatsoever (don't you have a heart!?)

See, only you can take it. But yet it goes unclaimed.

We might be hardwired to believe that taking credit where credit is due is actually selfish. But when we don't take it, we actually do ourselves a great disservice. (Not to mention, there is poor homeless credit lying abandoned in gutters everywhere.)

Why, what's the big deal, you ask? What happens when you don't take it (and who really cares anyway?)

Well frankly, not too many people will care that much if you don't take the credit, (it's annoying to people when you take too much and it's annoying to people if you don't take any) but when you continually don't take credit it does something to your insides and you're the only one you hurt.

For one, it lessens your accomplishment. Whatever it is you accomplished becomes "just ok," "mediocre," and "average," when the truth is, it probably isn't. There are things you do that other people simply do not do, for either lack of skill, patience, or basic guts & instinct. And even if other people somewhere in the world can do it and even maybe perhaps better, so what? YOU did it. YOU did. And you should be proud of that!

And because secondly, if you are not proud of that, your confidence falls prey to getting sucked right out into the confidence-sucking-vortex of unclaimed mad props. And you need that confidence to fuel yourself to keep going, keep working and keep building. Throwing your confidence into the confidence-sucking vortex is like throwing all your energy into the energy-sucking vortex and then at the end, ya got nothin.

Ah. I see.

But you still don't know how to actually accept and hold the credit, do you?

(That's ok. I have trouble with this one myself but I think I at least know how. It's the follow through that's the hard part. And also the breaking of the bad habit that is not accepting credit.)

How to give yourself credit

Step One: First, simply give yourself permission. Tell yourself it's ok to be proud of yourself and that it's ok to give yourself mad props. It is not selfish to do so. It is not selfless to let the credit lay homeless in a ditch either. It is, in fact, your personal responsibility to accept credit where credit is due.

Step Two: Accept it! If you're that afraid of looking like a tool by accepting the credit for what you did, there are ways you can accept credit without being a showoff about it. It's true! Just accept it nicely on the outside, have a beer (or two) and celebrate, on the outside you can keep it a low key but visibly happy party, but ON THE INSIDE (where it really counts!) make sure you throw a complete luau and overthetop MTV version of my sweet 16! Be proud of yourself! Let it fill you with confidence! You don't have to ooze with it, but be sure to allow yourself to shine!

Step Three: REPEAT!

I do, completely, understand the irony of this post coming from a person who is currently in an insane amount debt for giving herself credit, that's actually why I am writing this post.

I realized this morning that I am fed up with my current state of lack-of-self-credit-giving and that failure to accept credit is a confidence-sucking vortex.

(Really I just like saying "vortex." It's my favorite word right now.)

I was swimming this morning and currently, I feel like a shark in the water going really fast but the truth is I'm not, and I told my friend "It's like I'm paddling paddling paddling but I'm swimming in place."

However, I did swim a mile. She watched my form and told me I have good form. There is tweaking to be done, as in anything (and also probably nothing that simply more swimming won't overcome), but her words to me?

"You have to give yourself more credit."

Apparently it struck a chord with me because here I am writing this post.

So let's do ourselves a small favor and accept some credit, mkay? If not for yourself, for the poor homeless attention-starved credit out there cowering in the world all by itself. Claim it! It's lonely!

It is your duty!

(I'm going to give myself some credit for swimming a mile (however imperfect it was), cleaning the kitchen, making pancakes and having my coffee, all before 7:30 this morning.)

Now get on out there and give yourself some credit too.

You totally deserve it.

3 Reasons You Should Never Wait to Work Out

I cannot tell you how many times this weekend I cornered off a part of my day to work out only to be completely derailed.

My weekend was madness.

However, it was not without its learning experiences, especially about getting off my arse early and getting out the door when there's an opportunity because that opportunity just might not come again for a long while. You really just never know what the future will hold for you.

So if you're waffling on your workout right now, as we speak, read this AND THEN GO. Mkay?

TOP THREE REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT WAIT TO MOVE YOUR BUTT OUT THE DOOR

1. You spend the morning cleaning because there are people coming over and you think it's so much better to get all the cleaning done first before you go to the gym so that you won't have to worry about cleaning right up until the time that your guests get there. In theory, this sounds fabulous! But just go to the gym first mkay? Because otherwise, you will have cleaned the whole house, gone to the gym, put your swim cap on, zeroed out your watch and just as soon as you're about to take your first lap, the phone rings and you have a bloodied three-year-old who smashed his face on the coffee table who has to go to urgent care.

2. You call that workout a wash because you go to urgent care (he's ok, we have to see a dentist because he ripped his gums all up) and your friend's coming over to go out. You have a big workout in the morning so losing the swim is ok. You can just do the big workout tomorrow. However, you go to bed at 3:30 a.m. and you fail to wake up in time for said workout. And then, ahem, you don't really feel up for working out at this point. You haven't had sleep and your head hurts (from all the loud music of course), so Monday it is!

3. You spend Sunday securing your workout partners for the long workout you intended to do on Sunday and you're all set for Monday! Hurrah! At this point, all you'll have missed is a swim. NO BIGGIE! You get all your gear together, your workout clothes are all ready, all you have to do is throw your bike in the car at 6 a.m. and go. However. At 3:30 a.m. you wake up in a shot. Things are not good. And you remember the stomach virus that hath overtaken your son last Thursday. You thought you were out of the woods until.....you leave a message for your workout partners saying that you won't make it this time around. And you go on to lose three pounds that day. (I guess that's the bonus of a stomach virus, right?)

In sum, it all started out with the missed swim. You think it's just going to be one workout, but then it turns to two and then possibly three. Do you see how fast it all falls apart? And only one of those things was my fault! Everything else was just life! Learn from me! Do not wait! Waiting leads to more waiting which leads to more waiting and then before you know it, you're screwed!

So, take it from me. If you're doing the wiggly waffle this morning, get a hold of yourself! Figure out your priorities and make sure that everything you do lines up with those. And then do it!

Don't wait.

Cause tomorrow you could be in urgent care or hugging the bowl (or both).

Trust me.

Hope you all had a Happy 4th of July!

Ps. COME TO MY TWITTER PARTY TOMORROW!!

8 P.M. ET, PRIZES SPONSORED BY GIRLZ N GEAR!!! Leave your twitter handle below if you plan on coming! SEE YOU THERE!

Don't Go It Alone. Top 8 Reasons My Tri Group ROCKS (and why you should join one.)

The Swim at the Dunedin Triathlon

One day, I went to the beach to go to an open water swimming clinic. I couldn't find where I was supposed to be and instead, I ran into a group of people doing a training swim called the Palm Harbor Tri Warriors. They were walking up from the beach when I asked them if they knew of the clinic, they told me they heard it was canceled.

Darn it. I really needed that clinic.

Little did they know that I had been stalking their message board for a while up until that point but was too afraid to actually join a real triathlon group. I had only done one sprint at that point and obviously still needed a lot of help, since I was headed to a clinic.

But they took me in that day.

It was love at first sight. (For me, anyway).

If it weren't for them, I'd still be flailing around in the water by myself. All alone. If it weren't for their encouragement, I wouldn't have set the lofty goals of a half Iron distance triathlon last summer and a marathon for the winter. Not in a million years.

I realized all of this yesterday at the Dunedin Triathlon where I had the most fun at any race I have ever done in my life. It was located at the beach and causeway where we do all our training so it felt like our home court.

Could it seriously get any more gorgeous than this? This is Honeymoon Island.

Sure there were ups and downs and I didn't go as fast on the run as I wanted, but who cares!? This was fun! I came in 21st out of 44, representing the midpack of America and proud to do it!

The best part of this day though was being a part of my group.

And this wasn't even everyone!

An awesome group of people and the exact reason why you should join a group, do not be afraid, do not go it alone, GO JOIN A GROUP! Oh stop saying you're not sociable, so what?! Oh stop saying you're not good enough, you don't even have to have done a triathlon! I'm serious! These people have lots of information for you and if you're going through it, they been through it, join them! Just go to one meeting! DO IT! Mkay?

These are the top 8 reason my tri group rocks (I could actually go on and on but I'll stop at 8):

1. They're the most welcoming group I've ever met. I.E. the above example. Before I even knew them, they welcomed me in. Who does that? These guys do. Everyone is supportive no matter what level you are at, big, little, tall, short, disability, beginner, elite, anything in between. And I don't care who you are, triathletes in general are welcoming to anyone who wants to know more about the sport and be a part of the sport, because it is a lifestyle! It's an addiction!

2. These guys are like family. And why wouldn't they be? They know all your disgusting stories and they still like you afterward. They've probably seen you at your lowest point and at your highest moment. They've probably seen you after you left your soul on the course and you're reduced to nothing. Puke, tears and unspeakable bodily functions, you've talked about it, they may have even seen it (and vice versa), once that happens, you're family. Also they'll share their bra with you if you happen to forget one on race morning.

They'll kick your butt right up to the end!

3. They WILL.PUSH.YOU. To be better than you thought you were, to do things you never thought you would, and you will become a better person for it because they did.


Think you can fail with those faces screaming at you? That's right, DIG, TONY, DIG!

4. Your kids will think your triathlon friends are the coolest people in the world. "Mr. Shaker" is my 5 year old's favorite (oh heck, he's everyone's favorite!) He's superfast and he looks like a superhero, why wouldn't he be?! Anyway, when you get home from your race, you'll see this:

Their little bike and car left outside because they wanted to bike (or carride) followed by a run down the block and back.

See? You did that. You will walk in the door after your race to hear those tales and see them drinking their big-boy water bottles all hot and sweaty and it will make your heart sing.

5. You'll get a sign! Who doesn't want a sign? And even when your teammates aren't racing, they come and cheer their warriors on!!!! That's more than a group. It's a team.

6. (My favorite.) They are just as A-D-D as you are. If you're doing a triathlon, there's a good chance you've got some attention deficit disorder because you like to do a million things at once and get bored and distracted by shiny objects easily. But good news! So do all these people! Hurrah! The group will be broken down into two sections: those who write lists and are obsessive compulsive, and those who forget everything.

7. Most importantly: No Tri Warrior left behind! They wait for every single Tri Warrior to cross the finish, especially the newbies and the first timers. Now, imagine doing a race for the first time and crossing the finish line after all those blood sweat and tears shed on the course, all by yourself. Then imagine doing a race for the first time and crossing the finish with an entire group of people screaming your name and cheering you on! With signs! It doesn't matter if you come in dead last, this group will wait for you because you are awesome.

8. IT'S A GREAT TIME!

The group is awesome. Better than awesome.

And you should join one.

(Or join mine!)

But if you're not near me, there is awesome near you too somewhere, I promise.

So go find it.

MKay?

Guess the Pancake Shape (A giveaway post)

Sunday mornings have become a customary training day for me where I can get a long bike ride in or a long run (or both) with my training group (the Palm Harbor Tri Warriors).

What I love about it most though is the tradition that was born through my absence that my husband and boys have started, and that's "Pancake Sunday!"

Usually Pancake Sunday is over by the time I get home (boooooo) but I know they enjoy this time together and it's even more special because my husband cooks up shapes for them.

The latest one was pretty elaborate and specific (and creative!) so I thought I'd play a little game here of Guess the Pancake Shape!

So what do you think this one is?



How bout this one?


Yes I even have something in it for you!

Two randomly selected winners will receive a prize:

Prize #1: Free diapers! Winner will receive a coupon for free LUVS diapers, any size, jumbo pack! Woohoo! Diapers!  

Prize #2: This:
(One side)

(The other side)

The first winner will get to pick! Winners will be randomly selected from comments but I will publish the ones that make me laugh the most!

The contest will end at the end of Memorial Day on Monday night (12 a.m. Tuesday). I'll announce the winner on Tuesday!

Disclosure: Giveaway is just because. No reason. No one gave me anything for it. The end.

Twas the night before St. Anthony's

THE NIGHT BEFORE ST. ANTHONY'S

Twas the night before St. Anthony's

And all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring,

not even a spouse.

The bikes were all racked

in transition with care,

in hopes that a good race day

soon would be there.

The children were nestled

all snug in their beds,

knowing that Papa

would be there instead.

With I in my bracelet

and chip timer strap,

I had soon settled down

for a few hours' nap.

When out on my nightstand

there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed

To turn off the chatter.

When what to my wondering eyes did appear

but excitement and happiness

And no longer fear!

I gathered my backpack

my towel and Gu's

transition mat, (no wetsuit)

sneakers, bike shoes.

My helmet, race numbers

and my body glide

prepping my mind

for this wild ride.

I jumped in the car,

the stereo thumped,

I sang loud and hard,

to get myself pumped.

And soon there I was

with transition still dark,

my age on my calf,

my body marked.

The sun started rising

just over the bay,

I put on my swim cap

and got on my way.

I stood on Spa Beach

and it called to me,

the ocean, the waves,

the sparkling sea.

The national anthem,

Swimmers gathered around,

Last minute chatter,

The horn ready to sound.

In just 30 seconds,

It would be my turn,

the countdown's begun

and my face starts to burn.

I zero my watch,

And play air guitar:

Happy racing to all!

And to all, NEW PR!

BODIES.

Oh these bodies of ours. They can throw us for a loop so much can't they?

I'm sitting here with my giant jug of water that makes me look like a hamster when I drink it.

Hydrating because tomorrow is a really big race. St. Anthony's Olympic distance triathlon. One of my two really big races of the year (the other is the Augusta 1/2 Ironman in September.)

Right now it's 9 o'clock in the morning and we're supposed to be walking in the March of Dimes' March for Babies. I raised just over $700, just under my goal but still, our team as a whole raised about $6,000. (Thanks to all of you who donated directly and through Bondies for Babies! I love you!)

I wish I could see if our team won the family teams award like last year. My wagon is sitting in the front room all decorated because our theme was "NICU SURVIVOR." My son and I were going to wear camo.

It is the first time since my son was born that we didn't walk in this walk.

It feels weird and makes me want to cry.

My little one was up last night with a terrible fever and throwing up. I could have gone on the walk this morning with my older one, but I needed to take over the "next" shift after my husband pulled the all-nighter. Well I didn't need to, he could've handled it, but you know how it is. I got up and saw my husband sleeping on the floor in my little one's room and knew. I needed to be here.

My son got sick last night and I missed the walk today, but he slept in, we got up, I saw him eat again, I cleaned him up, sanitized his room, got everyone else fed and let my husband relax a little, instead of leaving at 6 a.m. to cram the 3 mile walk pulling a wagon into the day and worrying the whole way how he's doing and not enjoying that moment.

It's hard to let go of some of the things that are so important to me, like this walk.

But I'm trying a new approach to things and it's called (brilliantly), "letting go."

It's also called "cutting my losses," "living in the moment" or "come what may." But any way you put it, I'm trying to be at peace and guilt and sadness free with what happens and being one with my decisions.

It's not so easy though.

And it takes practice. I'm still practicing.

Now we're in sickness roulette, one of us may get it or NONE of us will get it! Who knows!? It's a wonderful game, isn't it!

And who knows, we might not race at all tomorrow.

But either way I'm ready for it.

And I'm hydrating with my giant water bottle.

Come what may, right? It's moment by moment up in here. I'm not anticipating anything and at the same time I'm anticipating everything.

So.

If no one is sick by 2 o'clock, I am picking up my race packet. If no one is sick by 8 o'clock tonight, I'm going to bed.

If no one is sick by 3 a.m., I'm waking up.

And if no one is sick by 7:30 a.m., I'M HEADED OFF INTO THE WATER in my orange swim cap. (ORANGE?! I WANTED PINK! But orange is my son's favorite color. That has always cracked me up and will definitely carry me through the swim. Even if I do look like fruit.)

Of course, I get almost everything that comes into this house so there is a good chance I may not be racing at all! However, the last time one of my sons pulled an all-nighter, no one else miraculously got it, so I'm clinging on to that. Strike that. Actually I'm just going to be one with whatever happens. Mkay? Now I'm just incessantly talking for the sake of hearing myself type.

For now, I hydrate.

If I go to bed tonight without any illness, I will post my traditional "Night before St. Anthony's" poem around bedtime and you'll know that I'm racing.

And tomorrow I will mobile post a picture from transition and you'll know I made it. (Of course I'll be tweeting from @christieo the whole time so you might know what's happening before then.)

But if it's Sunday and you're reading this, definitely one of us is hovered over the bowl, ok? So throw some "hope it passes quickly!" thoughts our way.

Mantra Monday: Slow Down, Breathe, KICK ASS

It's so hard to write a Mantra Monday post today about the week ahead when we had such an amazing weekend and there's so much fun weekend stuff to post about! Like the last game of tee-ball and the mad science party (rocket launch, mentos and coke, adventures in dry ice! so.much.fun.)

And then it was Easter and not to mention THE TOOTH FAIRY CAME on Easter too, which was completely unexpected!

How bout that tank top?

And also I found out what happens to a phone when a mom carries way too much stuff and is in a hurry and then the phone falls face down on the cement.

And now that the last week is over, my brain is now going a million miles a minute with the March of Dimes walk coming up on Saturday and it's time to switch gears because the ST. ANTHONY'S TRIATHLON IS ON SUNDAY!

I can't believe it's been a year since that race!

I just re-read that race report from my old blog and forgot how much it took to do that race, how much digging I had to do to cross that finish line.

So here I am, sitting, with my mind going a million miles an hour and getting a little freaked out and overwhelmed at what is about to transpire on Sunday.

The race on Sunday will not be wetsuit legal, the water is already 80 degrees and it needs to be 78 or below to be wetsuit legal. And the wetsuit, well, it actually saved my life last year. The water was so rough they had to eventually shorten the swim and the wetsuit helped me stay afloat. So I think I am getting nervous about not using a wetsuit.

However.

I did swim a mile in the ocean without a wetsuit last week and did just fine. But my fingers are still numb with nervousness as I type this.

Therefore the mantras have to be three-fold this week.

1. SLOW DOWN!
Because first and foremost, before anything I have to (calm) and slow down.

S-LOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW DOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWN.

Make lists.

Do one thing at.a.time. Slowwwwwwwwwwwly.

Ever hear in swimming that sometimes you have to slow down to speed up? It's so that you can slow down, get in synch again and get your breathing under control and then you can go faster. I have to do that. I have to slow down so I can get myself under control here.

2. Breathe.

And then when I succeed at slowing myself down, I have to breathe deep breaths. Big ol' slow deep breaths. And not be scerred. Cause I did this before right? I know way better now what to expect! (Let's not think about the fact that knowing what to expect can actually make you scared-er. Since you're no longer ignorant to what can happen. So strike that from the record. Not even thinking about that.) The fact is, I can do this. I hope I am in the same shape I was last year though. Am I? I am going to have to assume that I am since there's not much I can do about it now! And while I'm at it, self-doubt, be gone! There is no place for you here!

3. GEAR UP FOR ASS KICKING.

Finally, after all is said and done, I have to prep my mind for the ASS KICKING I'm going to do on Sunday! In a mid-packery type of ass-kicking way of course. Because I have to go HARD OR GO HOME! This is a race against myself, my brain and all my inner voices. Sure, it's a competition against other people, but really, it's just a competition with myself.

And in the end I have to remember to enjoy each moment as I go through them this week, this weekend at the walk, at packet pickup and the practice swim, and the night before the race.

Because like the little sticker that's sitting on my corkboard in front of me at my desk says, it's the little moments that make life big.

And I don't want to miss those.

Mantra Monday: Believe

Do you ever have a post in your head, words to write, but you can't get them out? They're swirling around in there in no certain order?

I'm hoping I can make a post out of this.

We'll see when I get to the end.

Look at our awesome tri group up there, those are the Tri Warriors.

They push me to train hard. They push me to keep up. They push me to believe.

In the last chapter of my latest freakout on myself (There is no Spoon), I had gotten to the point where I was tired of saying "I can't" and making excuses for myself. I was tired of holding myself back. I was tired of not believing in myself.

So, during the week I put my Mantra to work. "There is no spoon."

Whenever my mind would wander to "I can't do that..." or some other variation of such sentence, I'd finish it with, "Well why the hell not?" Those boundaries I had in my mind (certain predetermined miles per hour for running or biking or times or lengths for swimming which were "safe boundaries" for me), I erased them. I wiped the slate clean.

Yes, over the past couple years I've certainly come far and certainly pushed my boundaries (going from couch to whatever..) and I see that. I'm thrilled to be doing what I'm doing and breaking through the previous limitations I had set for myself.

But no matter how far I get, I notice that I never fail to make an endless list of excuses for myself. For why I don't think I'm good enough or for why I can't keep up. Back when I was told I was crazy for setting my sights on a triathlon, I did it anyway. But now that I'm doing them I want to do them well and no one is telling me that I can't do them well. EXCEPT FOR ME. Plenty of people can say something to you about what you're able to do and make limitations for you but YOU are the only real person who has control over whether or not you listen and whether or not you follow it and it's YOUR VOICE that speaks the loudest.

And what is that voice saying?

"I'm not built for running... short legs... my torso isn't big enough, something to do with the breathing and lung capacity, not a swimmer, I can't do that blah blah blah blah blah."

Honestly, the chatter in my head is exhausting and really quite ridiculous, really.

Last week I told myself to just shut my hole already.

I can't take it anymore my head hurts I'm sick of hearing the excuses I'm sick of talking bad about myself I'm sick of talking bad about myself to others I don't deserve that no one deserves that the chatter is too loud and frankly it's just exhausting to hear it over and over again!

So after the "There's no Spoon" post, I settled on one word.

Believe.

Amazing things happen when you believe.

Amazing things happen when you believe there are no boundaries.

So here are some things that I couldn't believe but after a week of no boundaries, I do. And you can picture a "sassy" me doing my best Martin Lawrence impression at the end of the sentence when saying, "Buh-LEE DAT!" (or "believe that!" in 'non sass') And maybe some snaps in a Z formation too..

I can't believe I was going 23 miles an hour, for a while, and I wasn't going downhill! Buh-LEE DAT! (snaps here.)

I can't believe I swam, stopping only while my goggles filled up with water, in water over my head, for a while, without freaking out about the fishes or breathing or anything! Buh-LEEEEEEE DAT!

Also I can't believe I did it confidently strong and somewhat fast! Buh-LEEEE DAT!

I can't believe I can feel stronger when running from my core and that all those minutes (hours?) of plank and pushups are paying off! Well Buh-LEEE DAT!

I can't believe that fear is dissolving and excitement and adrenaline is replacing it! That the child-like fearlessness is renewing itself! Buh-LEEEEEE DAT!

I can't believe that I'm starting to see lines where abs should be! Buh-LEEE DAT!

Honestly, it's scary to believe that you can do anything. Anything is a much larger vastness than a safe predetermined boundary.

When you look off into the distance toward anything, it's daunting! What will you come up against, what's out there trying to thwart you, and then, what happens after anything? More of anything?

Everything takes practice, perhaps believing in yourself takes practice too.

I also think it takes getting mad at yourself first. And me and myself had it out last week.

I'm glad we did, too, or I'd still be shuffling along wasting time and making excuses.

At the very least, anything you do should begin with believing in yourself.

I think I'm up for it now.

* * *
What's your mantra this week? Join me on Mondays when I try to start the week off right (or make sense of the complicated!)

Leave your mantra in the comments or post about it and leave the link in the comments below!

Weigh In Work Out Wednesday: Calorie Counting Experiment #546

In last week's post at Shrinking Jeans, I outed my inner conflict with "calorie counting in public."

Because believe it or not, it's a thing. Calorie counting in public is not the popular thing to do. In fact, it sort of annoys people.

Half because they think, "GAWD, give it a break already!" And half because when you're counting everything, people (my mom) think you've gone crazy and you're headed to the nearest eating disorder or starvation.

I assure you I am none of those things, nor am I in denial of such things, nor am I in denial that I'm in denial about such things (and so on and so forth.)

It's just that I'm a little over-educated in calorie counting now and uber-aware of what I'm eating while I try to lose the last 10. Like, um, 4 ounces of steak is NOT what I had pictured. Nor did I have any idea that just one cup of pasta takes up like NO space on my plate compared to what I used to pile on there.

I can see when it annoys waiters and waitresses when I ask for nutritional information. It annoys managers of restaurants when I call ahead and ask for nutritional information. It annoys people when they know I've looked up the nutritional information online before I went to a restaurant and it annoys people when I'm at someone's house and I refrain from certain foods or when I measure food in front of people who are at my house. It annoys people on special occasions/holiday/eating celebrations. I don't really blame them.

So, this past week, I was in a few situations that I thought might require easing up a bit and finding balance between totally neurotic and just sort of neurotic. Because I don't really like being the crazyperson, it's just that when I do things only partially, I know I'm not necessarily doing it "right," and I like to do things all the way.

Anyways. The result? No loss this week. None. Not even a pound.

Gah. Sorry Team Sass & Fury!! (My dear love Beki!) We were on the top ten weight-loss team last week too!! Number 6!!

So, that didn't work.


The experiment as follows:

Thursday McDonalds:
What "neurotic me" would have done: Order nothing, eat at home.
What "laid back me" did: Ordered two cheeseburger meal, shared it with 3 year old, got coke. Followed by swimming a mile.

Friday Spring Festival:
What "neurotic me" would have done: carefully scrutinize food so as to try and gather recipe in my head for calorie counting, taking tiny portions or have eaten before hand and not tried anything (BORING!)
What "laid back me" did: tried it all!Tried to estimate calories but eventually stopped and called the day a wash. OH WELL!

Saturday Celebration Station:
What "neurotic me" would have done: drank the protein shake I brought.
What "laid back me" did: ate two teeny tiny slices of pizza and had some lemonade because I was famished and crossed my fingers that the laser tag would work it off! Also, ran 6 miles afterward. IN 59 MINUTES!

Sunday Cheesecake Factory:
What "neurotic me" would have done: suggest somewhere else. Or eat at home and get only coffee.
What "laid back me" did: ordered the 840 cal steak and eggs because it was the fewest calorie-d brunch item (yes, I looked it up beforehand) but also it was a kickass protein meal for after my swim bike and run from the morning! I didnt' finish the whole plate of food either.

Sidenote: Spoiler alert! As much as I love Cheesecake Factory, which I do, my inner calorie counter gets pretty angry that most of their items are more than 1,000 calories and there are pastas on there that are more than 2,200 calories. It's almost criminal, I'm sorry. In some other state, they were forced to publish their nutritional data, and someone in that state was kind enough to post it here. Definitely for me, only a treat, like ONCE A YEAR. (end of sidenote.)

And then my husband and I ordered takeout that night and had a nice night in.

So maybe a little LESS of all that perhaps. *snicker* Not to mention the very basic notion that pizza and Mickey D's really isn't the best for fueling a hard workout but that's neither here or there, right? Ha!

Anyway, went too far the other way and in this case, it didn't balance out like my few indescretions of the previous week did. The good part is, I could do that if I wanted to maintain. But I don't want to maintain right now, I am focused on losing this last little bit.

In non-scale victory news however, my swimming is really coming along and so is my running! Speedwork in both of these REALLY REALLY helps and helps build confidence too.

(Repeat after me: THERE IS NO SPOON!)

I'll just have to be a little more mindful of the food this coming week and I can't apologize for the calorie counting. I'll try not to be so flashy about it, but it's what's gotta get done and that's the end of it.

I know. It's an intricately detailed report of my week and very likely TMI but it's easier to write it all out so I can work through it in my mind, so this is what you get! You're welcome!

How did you do???

Mantra Monday: "There is no spoon."

Remember how Neo kept trying to bend the spoon with his mind and it wouldn't budge?

After being a part of the Matrix for so long, his mind couldn't even fathom the idea that he could bend a spoon, but here was a wise little boy who could.  (Edited to note: After reading the comments, I can't believe how many people have not seen the MATRIX!!! Please go see it! I mean, I added the clip of the movie I'm talking about, it's pretty cool! Watch it, it's only a minute! Ps. sorry about the subtitles, it's the only one I found I could embed.) Anyway.

We had a great speaker for our Tri Warrior meeting at our local bike shop, Chainwheel Drive, last week.

This is Bruce. He's pretty badass. Also he's wearing one of my Bondi Bands.

He's been doing triathlons for five seasons and he places in his age group. He's got an all-business attitude about doing these things and although he soaks in every piece of information he can about triathlon, in the end he refuses to overthink things and he keeps things simple.

Just a guy on a bike. And maybe some water. Maybe.

I don't want to spoil the whole speech he gave because I'm writing it up for our Tri Warrior newsletter and I don't want the warriors who read my blog to have the spoiler here.

But I will say he inspired me.

Especially when it comes to training hard as opposed to "just training."

For me, the first season of triathlon was just about doing it. I just wanted to believe that I could.

The second season was just about doing it, but a little better. I just wanted to believe I could go a little faster, now that I knew the process a little better. I could and I did.

But now I want to do it as hard as I can. I want to break all those preconceived beliefs I have about myself. And I have quite a few. My mind whispers them in my ear all the time.

Here are my myths about myself that have seeped into my consciousness as fact:

• I can't run faster than a 10 minute mile and if I do, it's only because I'm having an off day.
• I can't run faster than a 10 minute mile for long distances, consistently, or after a bike
• I am not a good swimmer
• I can't go faster than 18 mph on the bike

When you have beliefs about what you can't do, it gives you an excuse not to pursue better.

You have built yourself a nice big a safety net so that when you don't run or ride or swim well, you already "knew" you couldn't do it anyway. So you don't let yourself down. You give yourself conservative goals based on the minimum you know you "can" do. Any more than that is what "other" people can do. But not you.

Sure you can do all these things enough to cross a finish line, but you're not fast or good at any of them. And then you allow it to frustrate you and simmer within you until one day you ask yourself: WELL WHY THE F*#CK NOT?!

Please excuse the strong language (we're all adults here, right?) but when you beat up on yourself for long enough, the tendency is to eventually explode.

And that's why he inspired me. It sort of made my insides explode.

He inspired me to ask myself, "Why the F*#ck not?!"

He never said those things but when you see evidence standing right in front of you of what happens when you push yourself to the brink, it allows you to reflect on your own training and ask yourself if you gave it everything.

Did I? More importantly, do I?

Here were his biggest points:

• Don't shock your body on race day by letting race day be the first time you push it until it hurts. Push it like it's race day during training. Then you'll be able to give more on race day.
• Which means when you train, you should be "somewhere between pain and injury." I.E. If it doesn't hurt, you're not doing it right.

There was a group laugh when he said "between pain and injury" but it makes sense, really. Obviously you don't want to get to where you injure yourself; you have to listen to your body and back off when it's too much. But don't back off just because it hurts. Cause really it's supposed to. Because that's when the change happens.

And if you push it hard during training (remember, past the pain but before the injury), then there's a good chance you'll be used to pushing hard, so you won't completely die on race day. We've all felt like dying on race day, haven't we? I rarely feel like dying after my training sessions.

After pushing it recently, where there is actual pain during training, I'm finding myself running faster, for longer, riding faster for longer, swimming more confidently. I really, really, really want to believe that those times are not set in stone just for me, Christie.

That I was not born with a 10 minute mile stamp on my forehead.

I don't even know where I came up with these numbers and why the dial stopped there.

(Is it because going faster than that hurts?)

Probably.

But it's supposed to. Remember?

At the very least, I want to believe that there is no number for me.

The only way to bend the spoon is not to concentrate and push your mind to do it, but to finally come to the realization already that, HELLO!

"THERE IS NO SPOON."

* * *

Oh yeah, by the way, Bruce from Chainwheel Drive is wearing my Bondi Bond up there because he's supporting my Bondis for Babies campaign! I need to break $1,000 for the March of Dimes, won't you help me???!!! Click here to see what I got!

Mr. Crab

Swimming with the skeeve is getting a little easier. Mostly because I'm getting faster but also because I'm just trying to shut up.

Cause in the past, I've been wimpy.

I've shunned the causeway for a swim because of the murk and I'm not really a big fan of the sea grass and the spiny sea anemone plant thingies that you swim over because let's face it, stuff hides in there and I don't like when stuff hides.

But I'm deciding to suck it up and deal because paying $8 every time I want to swim at the official pretty "beach" of Honeymoon Island is a little ridiculous just to avoid my skeeve factor.

I mean, just suck it up girl. It's all water. One just costs 8 bucks.

So today I went with the girls, both of whom think the water is just fine and one of them even thinks it's beautiful! And yesterday the water was crystal clear, no murk involved at all and if I was an avid snorkler, I really would have been in heaven. Because it is rich with sea life in there. (I'm the short one on the right in the picture by the way in case you were wondering.)

And I'm trying to be one with God's green earth, but I'm still a little jumpy in there. I see a big round flounder-looking fish just sitting there staring at me and it makes me jump 5 feet and then I feel stupid for jumping 5 feet for a nice fish and I keep swimming.

Then I swim some more and a few small fish dart away from me and their motion makes me jump 5 feet and I feel stupid for jumping 5 feet again for nice little fishies.

Calm down, already.

Save that jumping for the big mean ones.

So then we get to the turn around point and I turn around and come back and as I'm swimming I'm looking down at the ocean floor which is all sea grass and those spiny-looking plant thingies and some big conch shells that are moving and the occasion beer bottle (which really pisses me off) and then I look down and I see him.

Mr. Crab.

And he's huge and he's really freakin' pissed off that I'm swimming over him.

He is literally standing on his little tiny legs in the middle of the grass looking at me with those beady little tiny black eyes and he's reaching up at me with his big claws snapping away at me furiously as I swim over him and I am just out of his reach because we are not swimming in very deep water.

Snapping away furiously!

I mean, HE IS PISSED!

The vision of how pissed off this crab was still makes me laugh! He was really trying to get me!

Thank goodness I was out of his reach though because I'd have some pretty deep gashes in my wetsuit if I wasn't.

But boy was he mad!

I mean, please.

Like me and my wetsuit are gonna do anything to you, Mr. Crab.

I almost didn't even see you! I was just minding my own p's and q's! No need to be hostile!

Someone needs some anger management classes.

Gawd.

So I laughed about his little angry personality on the way back and how funny it looked then got jumpy about some other big round fish that was just sitting there staring at me as I passed (same one perhaps?) and I felt stupid and all of that and then said, "Decide you want it decide you want it decide you want it," which I do, then calmed down and finished up the swim. Still waiting for the ability to turn my brain off.

On a side note, I am finally officially bilateral breathing! I would never have known what that meant either because I was never a swimmer in my life so unless you swim, you probably don't care either, but it means I have learned to breathe on both sides which means every 3 strokes. Breakthrough!

It used to be every 4 strokes and only on the left and I'd be totally out of breath because it was too long in between breaths. But every 2 strokes was too short and the short breaths made me feel like I was hyperventhilating.

But three is juuuuuust right.

It only took about 4 swims in the pool where I drank the entire pool trying to breathe on my other side before I finally got it but it's so worth it. My point is that it not only makes me faster, but I never have to stop because now I have enough breath and that helps in dealing with the skeeve factor too.

Hooray!

Anyway.

That is all.

Oh, the kids have a huge spring festival today at their school where each class takes a country and performs a song dressed up in the country's theme and then we taste the food from all the countries. It's so fun and all the classes go all out, we've been working on it for weeks.

My 3 year old's class has the Phillipines and my 4 year old's class has North America and his whole class is dressing up like Abe Lincoln.

20 TINY ABE LINCOLNS! Even the girls!

Imagine how funny that's going to look! I'm dying inside just thinking about it!

OK now I'm done.

Really.

Signed,
Still a wimp, but getting better.

Work Out Weigh In Wednesday!

Hooray it is working, my God it is working!

Down 1.5 this week for a total of 3 for the challenge so far!

GO TEAM Sass & Fury!!

I can't help it I really don't like counting and measuring but I really do love My Fitness Pal if I am going to have to log! My husband is on it too now so we're both counting calories, which makes things easier for sure.

Here's something I read in Runner's World Magazine this week: Log when and what you eat, but also log WHERE you eat it. Is it at the table? At the couch? See where I'm going with it? You could pinpoint a bad habit or be doing what my 4 year old wants to do, which is eat out of boredom and not really hunger. I never even thought of that but it seems so simple!

Anyway, I did go over my calories Saturday at the Strawberry Festival (what a bugger it was to log that!) and its make-your-own-strawberry-shortcake but I had a ride and a run on Sunday and came well under my calories Sunday too to make up for it.

Workouts last week:
Wednesday: Swim 1500m (swimsuit blowout)
Thurs: Workout with Trainer, 4 mile run with group that was faster than me but I just gotta get over myself, right?
Fri: Spin bike 45 mins
Sat: Day off
Sun: 17.5 mile ride (17.5 mph avg) 3 mi run (29 mins)
Mon: 2,000 m swim
Tues: off

Oh yeah and I'm a little behind in 100 pushup challenge but I'm still hanging in there, hitting middle of week two! I maxed 20 at the end! Woot!

Goals for week ahead: just keep logging just keep logging just keep logging logging logging...

How are you doing??

Getting Out the Door is Like Battling the Universe Sometimes

I don't know what was with the universe last week but for some reason it did not want me to go out for my swim on one night in particular and if I'd have read the signs, I'd have just given up and turned back home.

But then let the universe win?

Noway.

I waited for my husband to get home from work and after eating dinner, I was saying goodnight to the kids. They wanted one story and then another. And then a drink of water and then some potty and more water and potty. No one wanted to sleep of course and it didn't matter anyway, I wasn't really needing to put them to bed it's just that it was taking me too long to extract myself from the situation.

So I finally did and let my husband do the dealing while I searched for my missing bathing suit and goggles.

I looked in the car for my goggles, I turned my room upside down, I found them hiding completely out in the open of course but I never found my bathing suit so I took one with me I hadn't worn in a while and then went to leave and couldn't find my keys.

So then I searched for my keys which I had left where I had found my goggles of course.

I headed to the door and the boys knew I was leaving so they came out to say goodbye and we did kisses then one of them plopped down on my foot and held my leg and wouldn't let go. And this went on for however much longer until I finally gave last hugs and got out the door.

I finally left and had to run a quick errand before the gym and when I went up to pay, the register froze and wouldn't let the customers in front of me pay and then wouldn't let me pay.

Longest line ever.

I get to the gym and put my stuff in my locker.

I left my goggles in the car.

Latest swim ever.

Maybe I'll get into the pool by 9 if I'm lucky.

I get my goggles, return to the locker room and put my swimsuit on. Finally, the very last step before actually getting into the pool! Hurrah!

Then quickly realized why I hadn't chosen to wear this particular swimsuit in a while.

The spandex in the back was worn and fighting for its own dear life to stay together. This is my second embarrassing swimsuit blowout.

That's unfortunate.

All you could see was black bathing suit, black bathing suit, until you get down toward my big white tuckus showing proudly through my black bathing suit where the spandex had worn out. And perhaps showing a little bit out the front too. On the top. Probably the two biggest purposes of coverage for the bathing suit in general and it was failing in both regions.

Very obviously the last time I will be wearing this bathing suit.

But I swam anyway, dammit, with all my parts happily submerged in the pool and quickly embraced by a towel upon pool exit.

So take that universe who tried to thwart me.

Me: 1
Universe: Zero.

Weigh-in - Work Out Wednesday

The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans, my favorite place in the world for free online weight-loss challenges and support is hosting a brand new challenge and it starts today! It's not too late to join! We're pairing up in teams of two so go grab a buddy and sign up here!

We are also doing the 100 pushup challenge! I started it a while back and it quickly fizzled but not this time! I'm at it again! So you might even see some more vlogs from me.

I paired up with my good online buddy Beki, from Wild Child Gone Good and our team name is Sass and Fury.

We're going to kick some butt this challenge. We are in the exact same boat, have the same amount to lose and both need a swift kick in the rear for some motivation, so I am hoping we can provide that support for each other.

My tri training is fully under way again and I am counting calories at My Fitness Pal. It says I should be eating just under 1300 calories a day. I get hungry just typing that.

You can see my handy dandy little helper at the top, I want to lose 12 pounds (10 would be good) in time for St. Anthony's on May 1st. 8 pounds would be fine too. Into the new decade is really what I'd like, the last few will come off as the season gets underway.

I'm also about to embark on spreadsheetorama so I can check off my workouts in an organized manner. I am already meal planning so that's a plus. And because all of this will be a matter of choices and making choices and all of the circumstances surrounding those choices can change moment by moment, we're also playing a little support game over at the Sisterhood through Twitter for the month of March. Go read about it here and play along!

Have a great day! Good luck to everyone on this challenge! Moment by Moment!

Mantra Monday: Sustain....Sort of like George Costanza on the Freeway

"Sustain" is a really weird word to have as a mantra, but when you say it with the rhythm of your feet it makes you really not want to slow down. It's sort of like "quick feet" in that way.

I re-realized something over the weekend while doing a tempo run down Bayshore Boulevard.

To make a change, it requires you to be consistent and consistently working at it, which means you have to be consistent also to get better at it. Which is a very basic principle I know but one that is very easy to forget.

But it's not enough to be consistent. You have to look at all the behaviors surrounding the consistency that allow you to actually *be* consistent. All the things that *support* your consistency.

For instance, if you're doing a tempo run to eventually become faster you have to "sustain" that pace for a long period of time. But you have to consistently work to change that tempo run to longer or faster or both in order to actually be consistent in changing. And then you have to be consistent about just getting out there in the first place. Which means sustaining the motivation, the willpower *and* the pace.

The same holds true for other areas of life: nutrition, motivation, willpower.

I ran and as my feet hit the pavement all I could think of was sustaining that pace; the whole purpose of the run. And as I was repeating the word, "sustain" -- each syllable when a foot struck the ground -- this was my realization: that in order to make changes elsewhere in my life I too must "sustain."

Sustain motivation.

Sustain willpower. 

Sustain control over food (i.e. not eating my face off because it controlled me.)

(By the way, the more times I write "sustain" the funnier it looks and makes me want to spellcheck even though I know it's right.)

Sustain speed.

Just sustain.

Don't slow down. Don't speed up (well maybe sometimes speed up.)

But in the end, just go.

And find it in me somehow to sustain the ability to just go.

When I put it that way, it gives me focus. It allows me to go a cool 55 miles per hour in my life and in my eating and my willpower and motivation, without slowing down. Because eating a Twinkie (or 10 of them) would be making a pitstop, which would mean slowing down. And I'd rather be like George Costanza on the freeway, making "good time."

I applied my "sustain" principle over the weekend and stayed the course. It was not that hard. I didn't eat my face off and I didn't feel like I was missing out on anything.

I've meal-planned for the week ahead (my meals are here) and I've worked in one day for treats and it makes me feel much more in control to give myself that day. I've got all my workouts planned for the week ahead too.

Because this thing is week by week, day by day, even moment by moment.

But as long as I sustain my momentum,  my willpower, my strength, my motivation, I'm good.
* * *

What's your mantra this week?

My Comfort Zone

I've been doing a lot of things that are outside my comfort zone lately. For instance, my armpits never hurt this bad in my life.

There are muscles in my armpits?

Even worse, there are muscles in my armpits that have been neglected? For all these years? Who knew? (Are you neglecting your armpit muscles? You should really think about that.)

My armpits still hurt 3 days after they've been worked out. I can't put my arms up.

Working my armpit muscles reminds me that I'm doing things that are wayyy outside my comfort zone. It feels like I am constantly looking at our trainer who's doing a demo of an exercise we're about to do a million of and thinking, "Egad, how on earth am I going to do that?!" She always makes it look easy but inside I know it's not easy and it scares me. No, it terrifies me.

Our bodies are going in weird places at the same time and I'm flailing about and balancing on objects and doing things while we're balancing on objects (sometimes I feel like a circus elephant on a ball but not nearly as graceful). I'm not even doing it in the privacy of my own home, I'm doing it in front of people, real people, and they're watching me fall over and lose my balance and going into total body failure. (Pullups do this to me almost immediately. Along with something called an "inchworm.")

Last week I asked her to turn up the music to mask my heavy breathing.

If I thought I was once in shape, I certainly don't feel that way now. That's why I know I need her. She has a way of sending my body into total body failure in less than 60 seconds.

If it weren't for her, I'd be sitting on my spin bike or running my same 3.1 miles at a comfortable speed or doing the same weight machines over and over and over again and going through the motions. And my armpits would still be neglected.

So I know it's good for me. I mean look at all the things I'll be able to do with beautifully defined armpit muscles.

Right?

So how often do you push it? Have you found any muscle surprises along the way?