More on the "Average Moms Wear Capes" Philosophy

This is my inaugural week of Average Moms Wear Capes and you may or may not have read about my "philosophy" behind it already. But I thought I might expand a little because it turns out it's something I'm pretty passionate about.

Over the course of the last two years, I've been doing a lot of soul-searching. You see, my whole life I've chased happiness.

I went to college, I went to New York City, I went to Salt Lake City, I chased after writing and producing jobs, I chased, I chased and I chased.

I never felt complete. Each time I chased, I thought it would be the last time. I thought I'd find my ultimate fulfillment.

I got married, I had children, stayed home with the kids, felt pretty darned good about this stage of life. But still, something was missing.

I thought I missed my career, yet it wasn't enough for me to actually go back to work. I thought I needed a hobby. I thought I needed to volunteer for something. I thought I needed to lose weight. Take a class in something. Make my own babyfood, homemade party invitations, be the class "mom." And I did all these things and they all felt good but it still didn't fill that hole I felt.

And then one day, almost like a switch, OH MY GOSH! I was happy.

Turns out it was there all along. But I ignored it. Because I found it within ME. (Go figure.)
I call this the day I found "my cape."

Because there was finally a day where I actually believed I could do what I wanted to do and be who I wanted to be and not be self-conscious about it and not wish I were someone else and not wish I looked like that girl over there.

I believe it happened somewhere along the weight-loss journey and that's why I believe the weight-loss journey is much more about the "journey" and less about the "weight-loss" itself. I believe it happened sometime after I crossed the finish line of my first triathlon. Yet, I don't believe it was the triathlon itself. I think that there was finally a point where I had actually gone really far in pushing myself to reach a goal, surpassing obstacles (which for me is a lot of my own head), overcoming fear and seeing my family change as I changed. I found out that I didn't have to keep trying to be "SuperMom" (or "SuperWOMAN"). Because first of all:

a. My job description alone made me "Super."
b. At least two little beings in my household think I'm already pretty darned "Super," no matter what I do or how I do it and whether or not my invitations and party favors are "homemade".

And I have been witness to so many of my beautiful momfriends and I have been in constant awe of their sacrifices, their work, their strength, their drive, their ability to fit it all in even though they don't feel like they do along with their amazing ability to diffuse a tantrum in 1.2 seconds, and it dawned on me that us moms are a pretty strong, pretty darned stubborn awesome bunch of women who truly need to believe in ourselves MORE. And wear our capes out loud! Because we ALL have them!

Without us, the very family framework falters. We're the glue. We're the rock. We juggle everything. We maintain 1,000,000 different lists. We assume 1,000,000 different roles and can change them within seconds. And whoever made up that term "Supermom" should be shot, honestly (please excuse me, I'm not usually violent). But we all try to "reach" this ideal that's been set out into the universe for us by some person out there who made us believe that such a thing actually exists, but then we never quite feel like we live up to those expectations, and then we feel like guilty failures because something we juggled happened to slip and then we sarcastically and inevitably mutter, "Yep. I'm "Mom of the Year."

Well I'm here to tell you that that "SuperMom" term can suck it. That the "Average Mom" is already "SuperMom."

I believe that we hide our capes when we don't cut ourselves some slack. We hide them when we feel like failures or we carry around mom-guilt for something. We hide them when we don't believe in ourselves, when we put ourselves last and when we let "time" get in the way of our awesome greatness. We hide them when we put ourselves down, compare ourselves to other moms or other women, and when we don't take care of our bodies and our minds. I just wanted to bring the following to your attention.

Mother. Definition by Webster’s:

Main Entry: moth•er Pronunciation: \ˈmə-thər\
Function: noun
1 a : a female parent

Really? That’s it?

Oh, I don’t think so. No offense Mr. Webster, I'm sure you're a really nice guy and all, but I'm afraid you're missing a couple a things here.

Mother. As defined and redefined by mothers everywhere:Parent. Guardian. Nurse. Baby-whisperer. Provider. Primary food-source. Health advocate. Hunter. Gatherer. Protector. Artist. Personal trainer. Fitness instructor. Chef. Chauffer. Race-car driver. Safety Administrator. Boss. Employee. Secretary. Accountant. Math- English-Social Studies-History-Geography-Science-Etiquette teacher. Ethics teacher. Tutor. Astronomer. Tour guide. Hostess. Waiter. Photographer. Media specialist. Party and event planner. Designer. Hair stylist. Home Decorator. Personal assistant. Football-baseball-basketball-soccer player. Coach. Advisor. Personal shopper. Lifeguard. Swimmer. Gymnast. Dancer. Conductor. Singer. Referee. Mediator. Mentor. Friend. Writer. Mail Carrier. Coordinator. Vending machine. Activist. Organizer. Etc, etc, etc... (feel free to add something I missed!)

And that’s just our first job! That doesn’t even begin to mention our second jobs, you know, the ones outside the home?

So. I ask you, why are we, average mommies everywhere, still striving to be  “SuperMom?” WE ALREADY ARE! (Do I really have to keep saying this??)

Yes, we are the "average everyday mommy." We are the ones with the voice. We are the ones who spend the money that companies want to target. We can do anything we want because we are capable of anything.

We would never in a million years want our children to stop short of living out their dreams, of being the best that they can be and of living their lives without regret, right?

So why would we want that for ourselves?

Yes. Average Moms Wear Capes. I believe we should not let another day go by without them proudly.
Today, I choose to be happy. Today, I choose to believe in myself. Today, I choose to live my life and not let anything, not time, not money, and especially not weight, stand in my way. Today, I choose to wear my cape out loud.

No regrets.

How about you?

Welcome to Average Moms Wear Capes! And A GIVEAWAY PARTY!

Hurrah! So what do you think of my new place??? I'm so excited I want to celebrate! And I'm going to, with an ENTIRE WEEK OF GIVEAWAYS of ALL MY FAVORITE THINGS!! It's "THE MY FAVORITE THINGS" Week O' Giveaways, starting RIGHT NOW! But you have to pay attention because each day is a different giveaway and you only have 24 hours to enter once each giveaway is posted!

I bet you're wondering why I've retired Baby Tea Leaves. Well, I've been working on my new blog for months now (and by I, I mean my dear friend Judi from the formerly Doodlebug Designs. who also designed Baby Tea Leaves, which I have recently retired -- thank you, Judi for "getting me" on both of these blogs! I *love* you!)

I have spent a long time in sort of a flux over Baby Tea Leaves. When I left my career as a news writer, I blogged about my family as an outlet. I loved my family blog so much and believe you me, there was never a shortage of material, especially when the babies turned into toddlers and all of that craziness that ensued. But then, somewhere along the way after the babies, I had a rediscovery. I rediscovered myself, and it was mostly through my post-partum weight-loss journey. So that's what I started writing about. Every little painful pound lost, every ounce of blood, sweat and tears I shed, I wrote about. I still wrote about the babies and their crazy stories, but now I was writing so much about weight-loss and fitness and it was all under Baby Tea Leaves and as I began to evolve, it just didn't fit anymore.

I needed something to fit me and everything that I had discovered about life, not just about motherhood, but about life in general.

If you know me, you know that my weight-loss journey took me through 50-something pounds and it was hard. Because when I started out, my stomach touched the steering wheel. And I wasn't even pregnant!

But what I went through was character building. It was confidence-building. And at some point, it became less about the weight-loss and more about the journey and I began to look at myself in the mirror and like myself again as a person, as a wife, as a mother.

Because I had found my cape!

And not only that, I realized that everyone has one! They're just hiding underneath our mom-clothes! We are so many things to so many people, yet we give ourselves so very little credit!!

But I've seen your capes! They're there! Truly they are! I have even seen them poking out of your blogs! From my wonderful girlfriends in real life to the very many awesome women who have inspired me with their greatness here in the blogosphere, I have seen your capes!

Yes, we were capable of so much before children (do you remember? It feels so long ago to me!) and sometimes we tend to lose that after the children, or at least I did. I totally did. If you didn't, then you are already wearing your cape out loud and hurray for you!! But one thing I realized was that even with all our new responsibilities, and especially because of our new responsibilities, that term "Super Mom" applies to all of us average mommies everywhere. Because we wear every hat in the world from doctor to coach to chef to chauffer to vending machine.

And that's how "Average Moms Wear Capes" was born.

So, I hope you'll follow me from Baby Tea Leaves and I hope you'll subscribe and bookmark and come back and visit. I'm going to do things a little differently here, I'm going to highlight workouts, have a Mom of the Month, do some more vlogging, talk about my time in the trenches with toddlers, recipes, reviews, etc. etc.

And while you're at it, take a look around, I've posted all my workout plans and food plans (if you care to know them) and a bevvy of all my other faves up on the tabbies up there.

OK, so more on this crazy week of giveaways!

Go on over RIGHT NOW to where I am giving away a Bondi Band. I will be posting a new giveaway each night at Midnight eastern time, so come back early and often to enter! The giveaways end at 11:59 pm the same day (it's a 24 hour giveaway) and at midnight a new one will post! These are all my absolute favorite things in the world and it will all end on Sunday August 8th with a big old Twitter party at 8-9:30 p.m. Eastern Time. We'll talk about fitness and motherhood and wearing your cape out loud and everyone who participates will have a shot at winning some great prizes.

You can see my Tweets at @christieo AND @MomsWearCapes and on "Average Moms Wear Capes" on Facebook too!! I'm excited for this change! So please hang around, mkay?

The Moms Wear Capes Philosophy

The Way I See it

Once upon a time, I was trying to be something called, "Supermom." You might have heard of the term. I tried to do the very best that I could at everything I could and I tried to juggle one-million-kajillion-kooplazillion things, some of which mattered but most of which in the grand scheme of things, really didn't. Inevitably I began to be a big, fat mom-fail at most and even all of them.

Or at least I thought I was.

But really I wasn't. Because I have such high expectations of myself and someone somewhere came up with the term "Supermom," so of course I believed that such a thing must exist and if I was going above and beyond at all times while a frazzled, dissheveled mess and still not achieving this "Supermom" status in my mind, then I must just not be good enough!I'm a failure as a mother! Right? (Do you think this? You know you do!) So to the person who invented the term, "Supermom,": it's a sham. Shame on you, it's a sham and a crock and I'll tell you why. Because along this motherhood journey, I realized a couple of things:

a. My job description alone makes me "Super."
b. At least two little beings in my household think I'm already pretty darned "Super," no matter what I do or how I do it and whether or not my invitations and party favors are "homemade".

I believe that the real "Supermom" is the average mom. The ones like you and the ones like me. The ones who have tiny little heart attacks every minute of every day over the safety of her little daredevils, the ones who lose sleep at night over the futures of these same little beings, the ones who nurse them through fears and colds and would do anything, give anything and be anything for that little person they love so much. That's Supermom, to me.

That's how AVERAGE MOMS WEAR CAPES was born. Because average moms do wear capes. Sometimes they're just hiding underneath our suits, tee-shirts, and velour track suits. But yes. That means you. And me. The whole lot of us. I have seen the capes of my girlfriends and I have seen the capes of the wonderful women in the blogosphere. You may not believe it's there, but trust me, I've seen it.

And if you don't believe me, I'll keep trying to convince you. Here's the sorry definition for Mother as defined by Webster's. (No offense, Webster's, but I think you're leaving a few things out.)

Mother. Definition by Webster’s:
Main Entry: moth•er
Pronunciation: \ˈmə-thər\
Function: noun
1 a : a female parent

Really? That’s it?

Oh, I don’t think so.

Mother. As defined and redefined by mothers everywhere:

Parent. Guardian. Nurse. Baby-whisperer. Provider. Primary food-source. Health advocate. Hunter. Gatherer. Protector. Artist. Personal trainer. Fitness instructor. Chef. Chauffer. Race-car driver. Safety Administrator. Boss. Employee. Secretary. Accountant. Math- English-Social Studies-History-Geography-Science-Etiquette teacher. Ethics teacher. Tutor. Astronomer. Tour guide. Hostess. Waiter. Photographer. Media specialist. Party and event planner. Designer. Hair stylist. Home Decorator. Personal assistant. Football-baseball-basketball-soccer player. Coach. Advisor. Personal shopper. Lifeguard. Swimmer. Gymnast. Dancer. Conductor. Singer. Referee. Mediator. Mentor. Friend. Writer. Mail Carrier. Coordinator. Vending machine. Activist. Organizer. Etc, etc, etc... (feel free to add something I missed!)

And that’s just our first job! That doesn’t even begin to mention our second jobs, you know, the ones outside the home?

So. I ask you, why are we, average mommies everywhere, still striving to be a “Supermom?” (And who made up that term anyway!) If you are a mom, you wear all those hats and more, so guess what?

You’re already a SUPERMOM. We are "average" en masse and we should be happy and proud of it! We should be supporting each other in our averageness and banding together -- we are all in this together! Safety in numbers!

That's my theory.