Thursday, August 12, 2010

Being Alone

When I lived in New York, I did a lot of things alone.

I felt like it was one of the only places where it was ok to do things alone. You could go to a restaurant and say "Party of one," and it wouldn't sound so odd, at least after the first time you said it because it always sounds odd the first time you say it.

You could go to a movie alone and you could go to a museum alone or to a club alone or take a bus alone to upstate New York where you would then take a cab from the bus stop to go white water rafting alone. I did that once. And it wasn't that weird. (Well, I guess it was a little weird pulling up to the rapids in a cab, but I had the time of my life so in the end, it wasn't.)

Lots of people did things alone. Sometimes I even thought it was odd that you could feel so alone in a place with so many people in it. When I moved out to Utah, it was a little more weird to be alone and not everyone did it but having lived in New York, it wasn't so weird to me. So one night I got sick of being alone and I got all gussied up and I went out to a club alone.

It was weird to stand in line at a club alone.

But the bouncer picked me and two other girls out of the crowd to go in and so we did and I ended up being friends with with these two girls for life and they came to my wedding.

So I'm glad I went out that night alone.

Now that I'm not in New York or Utah and I have two kids and a minivan in suburbia, it feels like I am never ever alone and it feels very strange when I am.

My mom told me about this video about "being alone" and it made me remember how freeing and wonderful it is to be alone, how confidence-boosting it is to try things alone and how even though you think everyone is watching you in your "alone-ness," they are not. So watch this amazing poem about being alone, about how to be alone, and try being alone, just once, even if it's just for a little bit, if you can and if life lets you. It is an amazing thing and sometimes amazing things happen. Please watch it, it's so worth it.
Ever done it? What was your greatest experience of being alone?

5 comments:

Kirsten said...

Being alone is awesome. I embraced it my senior year of high school. I used to take my journal and hang out drinking coffee at Denny's. There was no pressure to be "on". I still enjoy the rare quiet moments to go somewhere on my own and just watch people and enjoy the relative quiet. Running also gives me that time to "be". I've eaten in many restaurants and gone to movies alone. I cherish those moments, now more than ever because of their rarity.

Allie said...

Great post, I love that video. I used to do things alone before I was married. One time I had to get away from the hubby and the kids and have some me time so I went to the coffee shop and then I read a book at the park, that was probably one of the best days of my life. I really need to make an effort to be alone more because it's wonderful.

mathmama said...

My husband and kids were out of town for my birthday this year so I went to a nice dinner - alone! It was so nice, and quiet! LOVE ALONE TIME!

The Doll said...

I love being alone. But when you’re alone in Utah people think you’re crazy. I hate that. I remember working at a restaurant and anyone that came in alone would be teased and mocked. When I tell people I’m going to a movie alone they look at me like I’m nuts and offer to come. The best way for me to be alone here is to go for a drive. Then I can stop when ever/where ever I want and just enjoy me.

Audrey said...

Sometimes it's nice to just be. I love having alone time. :)

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